The Interview

by Funky DL

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The Incredible 12th studio album by Funky DL conceptually based around a radio interview.


released September 1, 2009

Produced by Funky DL for Washington Classics 2009



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Funky DL London, UK

Funky DL is regarded as one of the most legendary and significant MC's and Producers to come out of the UK. Now globally known for delivering albums with both musical and lyrical finesse...

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Track Name: Intro Interlude #1
Jingle: WASH FM

Dave VJ: It’s Dave VJ on Wash FM broadcasting live and direct for the next hour or so and special guest in the building today, the legend that is, right in front of me, hip-hop MC and producer and label owner “Funky DL” what’s going on Sir?

Funky DL: What’s going on man? I’m real good, you know.

Dave VJ: It’s great to get you up on the show, it’s been long overdue.

Funky DL: Yeah, that’s true but it’s good to be up here man.

Dave VJ: The thing I gotta ask you, and for those intrigued listeners who wanna know and me of course, why is it you chose hip-hop as a career? Cos it is very, very hard.

Funky DL: It’s a good question man; I guess for me like… from a very young age, like 12, 13 I just connected with hip-hop in a big way. And it wasn’t just the music but it was the culture as well, you know the message in what I was hearing. So I just began to embrace everything about it and I found like it was just fitting to me. It was like the perfect… harmony for my creative direction and I just loved it man. I knew that’s what I wanted to do with my life, you na’ mean? Hip-hop was the one…
Track Name: One
Verse One
Yo you all privy to listen to this sound so illy
it bump heads from Tokyo to West Philly
I’m one of a kind aint no matching my hits
I’m like Roadrunner you won’t catch me any time quick
It’s been a long time since I came into town
I seen Rappers swim, I seen Rappers drown
I’ve seem em’ looking puzzled in the lost and found
I used to sound dope call me awesome now
(F) fortunate to finds this fame
feeding of this feeling to finally gain
(U) unmatched, untouchable, undisputed
undescribable sounds I utter in my music
(N) now is not the time for nonsense
If you’re nothing but negative I’ll never need nothing
(K) killing it keenly and keep it moving
the kilohertz on the kick drum is beautiful
(Y) yo for years I’ve been yelling at you
I’m a young man but coming from yesterdays youth
(D) I demand that you don’t delete
this dynamite dialogue is definitely deep
(L) listen to my lyrics like you love it
I live for this lifestyle it’s likely you’ll learn lots from it
and that spells Funky DL take note
I aint DJ Kool but I’mma clear my throat one…
Track Name: Interlude #2

Dave VJ: So DL, what you’re saying to me is that hip-hop music was your calling and you immediately realized that once you had become exposed to it?

Funky DL: Most definitely, I mean it had to be part of my life cos everything felt so right about it. And it’s funny cos so many of my… my peers at school seemed to be into all other kinds of music that was kicking off, like Drum and Bass and all of that, so… and you know it… it was to the point where I felt like a minority but none of that ever swayed me from staying close to hip-hop.
Track Name: Hip-Hop
Hip-hop (x16) / (simultaneously) the real hip-hop (x7)
you don’t stop

Hip-hop (x16) / (simultaneously) / hip-hop, hip-hop, hip-hop,
I thank God for hip-hop, hip-hop, hip-hop,
it’s all down to hip hop, hip-hop, hip-hop,
I thank God for hip-hop, hip-hop, hip-hop, yeah

Verse One
I could have been a Crack Dealer; ay yo I could have a murderer
could have been a Mickey D’s manager flipping burgers
I could have been a burglar; I could have been the worst
Rapper on this planet that y’all never even heard of
I could have been a Doctor maybe even a Lawyer
I could have been an employee not an employer
I could have a been a car jacker or got jacked
I could have got shot in the back and that’s that
I could have been incarcerated for mad years
step out into the real world and not change gears
I could have been rich, squandered all my money and switched
and ended up a broke in a ditch
I could have been crazy and not been smart
I could have been emotionless and had no heart
I could have put money over love
I could have put the world before God and not worked hard
I could have been ruthless, I could have been a nerd,
geek or a doofus I could have been useless
I could have signed a bogus record contract
depressed cos my music aint out and I’m trapped
I could have stayed in one place all my life
I could have had a cheating wife who don’t act right
I could have not known how to bless the mic
but I do and it’s been alright and that’s down to hip-hop



Verse Two
I could have been the last sperm drop instead of the first
I could have been cursed I could be dead laying in a hearse
I don’t worry if I’m not the best I could have been the worst
I could be up in the third world dying of thirst
I could have had a one page story without no chapters
could have been unintelligent a bit backwards
with my eyes on the wrong prize and distracted
I could have been slacking and lacking the right package
I could have been wondering what if
I could have been deluded and living a myth
smoking a spliff and suffering from alcohol abuse
I could have been hidden from the truth I could be proof
that young black men make the best of their youth
this is real talk straight from the booth
I could have had no clue and no tenacity
I could have been suppressed and never reaching my capacity
I could have been nothing I could have been no one
I could have been 00 I’d rather be 01
I could have done put in time and had no fun
and made no money but rather me owe some
I could have been a whole lot of things
some worse some better some you lose some you win
I could have not known how to rock the mic
but I do it became my life and that’s down to hip-hop



Outro Chant
Hip-hop (x32)
Track Name: Interlude #3

Dave VJ: You’re tuned into Wash FM with me, Mr VJ aka the Vinyl Junkie and special guest in the building today “Funky DL” and for those of you who have just joined us… where have you been by the way? He’s been explaining what hip-hop means to him and how its always meant a lot more than just a form of music, so speak on it Sir?
Track Name: 1947 featuring Lei-an and Xantoné Blacq
It’s 1947 town and there’s some rumours floating round
but I don’t know, I don’t know,
Gals and Gangsters on the prowl, I heard something bad is going down
but I don’t know, I don’t know.

Verse One
It’s 1947 and I’m sitting in my ritzy joint
sipping on a whiskey on the rocks
the barmaid dame points over to the door where I see
this hotshot out of town reporter walks over shows me a mug shot
and says “I’m looking for the Big Cheese Mickey Four Thumbs”
I told him “I aint seen him” and he asked me
“do you know some of Mickey’s goons like Little Charlie Raincoat?”
I told him “Certainly but he skipped town weeks ago,
I didn’t catch your name you got a nerve coming up in here
asking me these questions so I’m asking what’s the big idea?
Why I oughta, who are you some kind of wise guy?
Beat it you aint nobody in here, you just a fly by”
he said “don’t blow your top I got something you need Jack”
then reached into his pocket and pulled out a dozen Greenbacks
“huh, now you’re talking let me see that picture once more,
oh yeah Mickey, you might find him at the Drugstore”


Verse Two
The reporter said “swell gee Jack that’s might nice of ya”
he split from out the joint and then he hopped in to a Chrysler jalopy
then I quickly gave Mickey a call and explained
he said “don’t worry he aint nothing but a meatball,
he’s from the Big Apple and get a load of this
he thinks I was involved in that case from 46’
with what’s his face? Chrome Dome the bald guy and some doll,
you know the one that Johnny let him have it and got bumped off”
“the one who wore the Alligator shoes and always had the hots
for Mary down the road? You mean Pauli” “yeah that stupid klutz,
he knocked off a bank last year and tried to frame me
and plus he owes me money tried to scram and didn’t pay me
so me and my Gorillas went to see his old lady”
“hmm is that the one in hospital? Was that you Mickey? “maybe”
“but she won’t talk, matter fact I think she can’t talk”
“and plus the fact she won’t be going nowhere till she can walk”


Verse Three
“The reporter’s pulling in; I can see him out the window”
“so what you gone do Mickey?” “Whichever way the wind blows,
Jack let me handle this and call you back shortly
he’s only a reporter so all he can do’s report me
what he think, I’m small time and get the Heebie Jeebies?
Cos I can click my fingers and he’d wish he didn’t see me
I’ll make him cop a slave then I’ll put him on the payroll
and if he doesn’t swing for it I’ll hit him with a table
so if he wants rhubarb, he’s come to the right place
but this is not the right place to get to keep a nice face”
“look see Mickey, hey some customers just came in
plus it’s hard to hear ya cos the band just started playing
let me know what happens when I speak to you tonight
and be careful cos the cops are everywhere in black and whites”
just before I hung up the phone my heart stopped
cos I heard a gun go off and Mickey got shot!

Outro Chorus
It’s 1947 town and there’s some rumours floating round
but I don’t know, I don’t know,
Gals and Gangsters on the prowl, I heard something bad is going down
but I don’t know, I don’t know,
I gotta grab my bag and scram, don’t want no one knowing who I am
that I know, that I know,
don’t want no cops harassing me or nobody else to be asking me
no questions cos I don’t know.
it’s 1947 town and there’s some rumours floating round
but I don’t know, I don’t know,
Gals and Gangsters on the prowl, heard something bad is going down
but I don’t know, I don’t know, yay-ay
Track Name: Interlude #4

Dave VJ: So D? Tell me. You’ve produced a lot of tracks over the years, I mean a whole lot of tracks and they are diversified but most of the tracks that you do tend to fall into the jazz and soul nature of things, umm is there a specific reason why you focused on those particular styles?

Funky DL: I mean I guess I would say that I just loved everything that had a soulful melody. I’d find some like real smooth breaks and just upon hearing them, the only way I could describe the sound was just like… that sounds so sexy.
Track Name: So Sexy
So sexy (x4)

How did you get to be so sexy? I don’t know,
Don’t know how you can be so sexy, I don’t know,
When I see you, you seem so sexy, I don’t know,
Does this mean that you feel so sexy? Tell me.

Verse One
It’s me again, let me talk to you at 99bpm
I saw you from way back when
and there were many things I couldn’t say back then
I guess that you could say that I was laid back then
but now it’s all different
so pay attention girl I hope that you are listening
at first I thought I like you just a little bit
but that little bit just grew to be a bigger bit
you (you) are looking magnificent
long hair, pretty smile, lip gloss glistening
do that cute thing blowing all them kisses and
I know you probably got a bunch of dudes whistling
I will do almost anything
to show you that I am a true gentleman
let’s go, I’ll pick you up at nine we can go catch a show
and if it’s raining yo we don’t have to go
we can stay inside and chill some more
and let me tell you some more things you didn’t know
while we kick back and listen to some De La Soul
you’re so sexy, I wanna know


Verse Two
Just yesterday I was thinking to myself
lets just say the idea of you and me blessed this way
means we’ll probably never have a restless day
now isn’t that beautiful?
baby all I want to be is truthful
diligent and useful providing what you’re used to
everyday you looking so youthful
I hope you pay attention just to what them other dudes do
promising that they can be your Captain
but I don’t make promises I make things happen
(yo ever since) ever since I started rapping
I made a lot of girl tracks this is most accurate
and the fact is I really made my mind up
so I can see a Playboy line up
but I’m telling each and every one honey your time’s up
grown man talk now I gotta wise up
back to you girl forget the rest
you straight blow em’ out the water honey no contest
let me take you out or if you need some rest
we can kick back and listen to some Tribe Called Quest you’re so sexy


So sexy (x4)
Track Name: Interlude #5

Dave VJ: Now DL, we come to a bit of a dodgy question but true say you’re a friend we’ve kind of brushed on it in the commercial break, lets get into it, I didn’t wanna embarrass you but you know what’s coming next, you know I gotta ask, and I’m sure all the listeners need to know too. What is the deal with you and female attention on tour? Cos you go all over the place, so fill us in bro!
Track Name: Out of Touch
I thought this chick was magnificent
until I got to know her and I saw so many differences
and I could think of many instances
when I had to stay away and keep so many distances
but I don’t know what happened this time
maybe I just fell in love or maybe I was just blind
maybe I was insane, let me take my time to explain…

Verse One
See she loved her Sci-Fi and I loved my Hi-Fi
see I worked erratically and she worked a nine to five
I’d drink a root beer and she’d drink fine wine
and I’d buy the CD she got it from Limewire
and I loved the Autumn her favourite was Summertime
and I would shop in the store and she would shop online
and she was always late, I’m constantly on time
she’d only eat certain things while I would try all kinds
I’d show her love everyday, she’d show me on Valentines
and I would stick to the truth, she always had alibis
my friends were guys and girls, her friends were only guys
her money was all hers, my money was both of ours
and I was a realist while she would just fantasize
and she would decide quick, I took time to analyze
we’d never meet in the middle, it’s just me in the middle
and I’m feeling a little…

Out of touch, we too different and it seems like we out of luck
so will we both stay together? I doubt it much
I don’t see that happening cos we out of luck and I doubt it much
cos we out of touch, we too different and it seems like we out of luck
so will we both stay together? I doubt it much
I don’t see that happening cos we out of luck and I doubt it much
cos we out of touch


Verse Two
See she loved the new school and I loved the old school
and I was T-Mobile and she was on 02
I liked my red meat, she only liked Tofu
and I was a leader, she would do what most do
she liked to spend doe while I liked to save doe
I spoke with choice words while she was a say so
I liked all R&B, she only liked J-Lo
and I’d rock a no name, she only wore labels
I always work hard, she wanted it easy
I loved the cinema she only watched TV
I listened to Motown, she didn’t like Stevie
I’m slow to my anger, but she is so speedy
she liked to sleep in while I’d always wake up
I liked her natural, she always wore makeup
we’d never meet in the middle, it’s just me in the middle
and I’m feeling a little…

Track Name: Interlude #6

Jingle: WASH FM

Dave VJ: Live in the studio, my special guest Funky DL. Ah so tell me, if you’re in a relationship, how hard is it to actually maintain a relationship and still… I guess at the same time be married to your work?

Funky DL: I mean I feel that’s always an individual thing, you know umm… it depends on who’s involved and how needy they are of each other and also how well two people can compliment each other. The right two people can have a real harmonious and prosperous relationship no matter what they do, but all it takes is for the wrong two people to get together and the result can just end up being… well a crying shame.
Track Name: Crying Shame featuring featuring Lei-an and Xantoné Blacq
Now tell me what they both supposed to do
they really don’t seem compatible and it’s a crying shame
she says he doesn’t do what he’s supposed to do
he says she never changes her attitude so it’s crying shame

Verse One
I knew this chick named “Shame” she was crying I asked why?
and she told me she aint trying to keep from dying
she’s half black and half Hawaiian and keeps lying to herself
and keeps denying that she can be much more
I pondered with such thought remained silent
she got a dude who’s very violent
he gives her black eyes when he cannot control her every movement
she wants it to stop but aint prepared to lose him
it sounds kind of stupid and now he moved in and aint left
now being at home is like facing death
she doesn’t work she doesn’t study, he doesn’t worry
he’s out late she calls him “come home” he doesn’t hurry
and gets mad hen her family calls
like she didn’t know nobody before, that’s not all
he forces her to take care of his son
no it’s not her child it’s a previous one while he’s out
with his friends having mad fun everyday
and treating life like a vacation
yo but she get no part of that holiday
and now she on Prozac popping like one a day, it’s not a game
she let her dude become her downfall now it’s all looking grim
now it’s not about her it’s all him
and everyday is like a loop of the day prior
but she doesn’t seem to tire, it’s a crying shame


Verse Two
Yo, I knew this dude called “Crying Shame” always weeping
asked the reason and that’s when he commenced the speaking
about his girlfriend, no job, lazy person
doesn’t work hard, sits around watching TV life easy
she flirts with his friends no ends to the nonsense
doesn’t use her common sense, he the breadwinner
comes home to find no dinner, stereo playing
every other light is on when bills need paying
he’s sick with her lifestyle all has is just a nice smile
cute style but her inside empty
no focus, she way past her early twenties
and her phone never stops ringing
she spends half the morning in the mirror singing
and eating all the groceries
said he didn’t think that this the way that love supposed to be
plus he thinks she got a man on the side
the way she whispers, she plays the mistress
and gets new jewels just after Christmas
it went from magic and turned to tragic
she steals from him and if he confronts her
she turns around to say she wouldn’t do that she loves him
it’s just words but they strong enough to keep em’ together
so he lives through her every endeavour
and everyday is a repeat of the previous
but nothing changes so I guess it aint serious, a crying shame

Chorus (x2)

Such a crying shame
Track Name: Interlude #7

Dave VJ: Yeah I’ve interviewed you so many times, we’ve never actually asked this… umm you must have quite an in depth knowledge of jazz music because your music is predominantly laden with jazz, so is there anything you actually look for or in this case listen for when you actually dig in the crates to find something to loop up to make the musical match with the beats?

Funky DL: Well I mean most times when I’m looking for breaks, I pay attention to several things; for example, whether it’s a studio or live recording. Umm how many musicians feature, is it a soloist? Duet, trio, quartet, quintet, sextet, full orchestra even… umm but I look out for the date of the recording as well cos if you’re not careful you’ll buy something recorded in mono back in the 1920’s and it’ll probably sound real dusty…
Track Name: Dusty
Intro (x2)
Check, check, check, check (it sounds dusty)
check, check, check, check (it sounds dusty)
check, check, check, check (it sounds dusty)
check, check, check, check

Verse One
It’s the F.U.N.K. I’m all up in this mess again
the microphone motorist, don’t mess with mic pedestrians
hold tight, this is how we rock all day and all night
I’m like the teacher who confiscated your mic
alright calm down I aint about to fall out
you’ze a bad bwoy? Son you don’t know what you talk bout
with your baseball bat, forget to bring the ball out?
while your folks call y’all in I’m going all out
veteran, doing it again homie and yet again
better than them thugs, gentlemen and all the rest of them
DL, king of the show like David Letterman
and I’m kinda cold so you better take your vitamins
vitamins, you should take a look at what I’m writing in
fresh like air homie, you can call me Nitrogen
tighter than the tightest and hyper than the hypist
East Londoners say I’m dark, push up your lighters
we handle any situations like we Rambo
get too close and we’ll split ya like a mango
trying to from a partnership with cash like we Tango
and move into the future like we Hiro and Ando
we make moves from Prague to Orlando
and bring the solutions like Hopkirk and Randall
and if you trying bringing us a scandal
we’ll leave you in the street with your Monkey and a Banjo

Check, check, anytime we come we dett (it sounds dusty)
check, anytime we come we dett (it sounds dusty)
check, anytime we come we dett
I know you never hear dem’ style ya’ yet so hear dis’
check (dusty) check, anytime we come we dett (it sounds dusty)
check, anytime we come we dett (it sounds dusty)
check, anytime we come we dett
as we move, ya hear me dude we rude

Verse Two
Check it, it’s the D. dot L. and Shazamme from Dynametrixs
wrecked it, came wid’ it persuaded all the sceptics
this beat weighs a ton forget the other metrics
run tings’ on road not them kiddie skalectrix
ruthless, we don’t deal with nobody that’s useless
riddim’ so sweet that we bound to leave you toothless
so don’t be mad at me for wrecking all your cavities
Wash family, we flow on beats with zero gravity
happily, plus the fact we want you all to notice
that we bout’ to take over just like a swarm of Locusts
we focus, just listen to how I wrote this
magical I might as well keep saying hocus pocus
and disappear, reappear then disappear then come back
the type of rapper who can tell my whole life on one track
one track mind, 24 track studio
big bad beats and ill rhymes and that’s my duty yo
bad bwoy’ sound, rude bwoys’ up in your area
screaming I will battle you but fail the criteria
and couldn’t rock the microphone and cause any hysteria
but this is how we do it from Japan to Nigeria
and Switzerland so you better Swatch’ this style
nobody aint ever gonna stop this now
so trust me, the funkiest man I really must be
cos when it comes to making it bang we do it dusty


Check (x32)
Track Name: Interlude #8

Dave VJ: DL man, you have come such a long way since your first album back in 1997, that is a long time bro… obviously not only the industry but the world has changed a great deal since then. Is there anything you miss from the times when you first started?

Funky DL: Ah most definitely man, I mean I really miss the feeling of being part of a movement, you know, when I first started I used to go out a lot more and meet the other MC’s and Deejays coming up in the game. You know the ones that were kinda getting the same heat as me and those times were golden. You don’t really see the faces anymore at least you don’t recognize the faces that you are seeing and sometimes I feel I’d give anything to have that feeling of being back around the old school.
Track Name: Back Around The Old School
Now I’m back around the old school that raised me
now I’m back around the old school that raised me
now I’m, now I’m back around the old school that raised me
now I’m back around the old school that raised me

Now I’m back around the old school that raised me (back around the old school)
now I’m back around the old school that raised me
now I’m, now I’m back around the old school that raised me (back around the old school) now I’m back around the old school that raised me (back)

Verse One
Now I’m back around the old school that raised me it’s crazy
3 feet high and rising with daisy’s
caps to the back, fresh mesh, fresh to death
best dressed so don’t step on my sneakers
spit a rhyme I’ll leave you speechless
back to the struggle
when Def Jam had Russell in the hustle
and Break-dance 1 had the muscles from Brussels
doing handclaps in black Spandex
back when Smokey was a bandit
I’m guarding the mic, my man’s next
spit it like Special Ed, Biz Mark and KRS
or the Fresh Prince and Jazz Jeff
back when we used to worry bout’ the year 2000
millennium bugs now the ghetto got millennium thugs
and hip-hop evolved and young bloods feel old
platinum replaced gold, competition’s fierce
and vinyl stores are scarce it’s a ghost town
it’s like the Sheriff got scared and fle’ed the showdown
and Berry Gordy quit Motown, where’s Stevie Wonder?
Last I heard he did a track with Busta
without the old school there’s no school
now I’m back around it feels so cool

Chorus (x2)

Verse Two
Now I’m back around the old school, young with no front teeth
listening to Kool Keith and Stetsasonic
before De La did Bionix, before Dre did The Chronic
the ladies wore door knocker earrings and bandanas
and young kids believed in Santa
and hip-hop was beats, rhymes, pops and locks
where Rakim made em’ clap while Eric would cut
and the term Sucker MC’s was for Sucker MC’s
and these synthesized beats on keys were not born
and Pete Rock made a hook using only a horn
I reminisce and think about the wonderful bliss
when ice was only for drinks and was never for wrists
and selling out was for them punks, it was never for this
we maintained, when adversity came we changed lanes
our words had the power to sway and change brains
and free our own people from these shackles and chains
that imprison the youth and imprison the truth
so I’mma act like a prisoner when I’m in the booth
and hold bars get it? I’m no fool, there’s no rules
there’s no clues paid my dues when reppin’ the old school

Chorus (x2)

Verse Three
Now I’m back around the old school before Mafia names
where kids took a can sprayed graffiti on trains
it was tagging, MC’ing was the art of bragging
before rumours of gay rappers and Armageddon
and every rap record was a lesson schooling me
was the likes of Young MC and Schooly D
catch my drift? And double vinyl records didn’t exist
now they old news demoted to old tunes
but them plastics are considered classics
some are worth paper do the mathematics
yo, I let my tape rock till my tape pop
when my tape got stuck I was like man what
pushing paper in the top holes my blanks ran out
every week I was taping what was hot on the street
pressing pause when the DJ was beginning to speak
hoping that the track would leave a little loop of the beat
and I love them days, them days were priceless
one of the nicest times in my life
when I think back they still amaze me it’s crazy
cos now I’m back around the old school that raised me

Chorus (x2)
Track Name: Interlude #9

Jingle: WASH FM

Dave VJ: It’s Wash Fm with me Dave VJ aka the Vinyl Junkie, special guest Funky DL. D? Would you say that you’ve fulfilled most of the aspirations that you had when you first started out in this game as an artist? Or are there many things which you have envisaged that have not yet come to pass?

Funky DL: I mean, I would say that I got to do most of the things I had realistically hoped for back then, umm and there were many things that happened to me, umm many attributes that I acquired that I didn’t expect. I think the key for me has been learning to accept that my plan and the worlds plan for me are not always equal so there will be things that I want and can’t have but also things that I don’t seek that just come… and that’s life…
Track Name: That's Life
Intro (x4)
That’s life, that’s life, that’s life, that’s life, that’s life

Verse One
My Pops told me that I was alone in this world
when there’s trouble it’s bound to be a solitary struggle
when you’re rich you won’t see notin’ but extended arms
when you broke you can’t do nothing but extend your charm
but it doesn’t take much to improve your situation
when you got no money but you exercise patience
the fact is everywhere you turn there’s many taxes
that’s why we gotta’ put in any practise
to catch this good life we all seeking
I learned how not to listen when a fool’s speaking, I won’t profit
so I only listen to a wise mans words
and it takes a lot to really quench a wise mans thirst
for life, that’s why I never settle for what is
or settle for what was, how can we really live?
If we work hard, see an opportunity and take it
six bils’ the population but we all can’t make it but that’s life

When you find someone and then you fall in love
and then they break your heart (that’s life)
when you’re underpaid and you’re late for work
and plus your car won’t start (that’s life)
when your baby’s born and the birth was smooth
and it’s healthy (that’s life)
when you went from broke and then you made a move
and now you’re wealthy (that’s)

Verse Two
I made crazy money when I was just in my teens
signed a contract for writing rhymes and making beats
put in five years work and then another five
waiting patiently for everything I dreamed for to arrive
and as I got older I became more aware
that a little comes here and a little comes there
and some things are not for me I learned to accept it
failure tried to be my friend, I learned to reject him
but even though I did good and raised up my business
I got stopped by the police who said I looked suspicious
got pulled to the side had to empty out my pockets
they asked of ID so I reached into my wallet
then showed them my visa with my name and my business
they attitude changed and they took mad interest
they realized I had no time for crime in my life
but an all black Hoodie was a stereotype but that’s life

When you’ve planned for a whole year to take a trip
and now it’s here you’re sick (that’s life)
when you bought new clothes in the store last week
and they just don’t fit (that’s life)
when you call a friend and apologize
now you tight again (that’s life)
when you lost all faith but you pray to God
and now there’s light again (that’s)

Refrain (x2)
That’s life, that’s life, that’s life, that’s life, that’s life

Verse Three
One of my real good friends put his girl in a coma
I think it was the ignorance and drugs taking over
another good friend turned his back on me quickly
after such a long time and for less than a fifty
I have another friend and to him I stay close
he works real hard I respect him the most
has my back when I need it, I got his when he need mine
he going fast forward while the others just rewind
see I understand the true value of a man
doing what you cannot instead of doing what you can
diligence, integrity, tolerance and sacrifice
speak the hard truth no pretence and always acting nice
there’s a few that I can trust with my life
who won’t serve they own cause but will do what is right
and God created every man to be this way
but many got contaminated, principles changed but that’s life

When you go to the bank just to get some cash
and it swallows your card (that’s life)
plus the bank is closed and your cash is low
now you thinking hard (that’s life)
when you passed a test and your grade was A
and you glistening (that’s life)
when you start to speak everybody stops
and they listening (that’s life, yeah)
(that’s life x5)
Track Name: Interlude #10

Dave VJ: So DL, tell me, if you had a piece of advice, key advice for up and coming artists, what would it be?

Funky DL: Just to work extremely hard man, to really work hard. I don’t know what it is about some people and their bad work ethics but so many artists wanna’ enjoy success without investing the effort needed to achieve it… It’s kinda like, ya na’ mean, nobody wants to help set up the hall but everybody wants to come to the party.
Track Name: The Party
Verse One
I didn’t have no money
but my friend called me and he told me bout’ a party
whose going? He told me everybody
so I put on my Pierre Cardin cardy
I gave a quick call to Charlene
but her sister picked up told me that she’s busy sorry
I made my way to the party
nuff’ people inside we packed like sardines
they playing Talib Kweli
they played Bob Marley and even Gnarles Barkley
now they playing “Ladi Dadi”
we don’t cause trouble we don’t bother nobody
bre’s’ acting like they just joined the army
I spotted three girls sitting in the corner calmly
all dressed up like Barbie
the middle one was Asian and she had a nice body
sipping lime and Bacardi
I’m looking in her eyes they’re saying “charm me, charm me”
so I said “pardon me,
I love the way you smile girl you’re sweet like honey”
her friend said “don’t waste your time honey
she doesn’t speak English only speaks Guajarati”
“don’t she understand a word I say?” “Hardly
plus she got a boyfriend and he’s over by the bar see,
now there’s no need to worry,
but the is a boxer kinda’ like Muhammad Ali”
“you taking me for Laurel and Hardy,
what’s the worst he can do? Feather and tar me?”
I don’t really gotta leave in a hurry
but I just step even though it’s kinda funny
now I’m on my solitaire
brock’ pocket acting like a millionaire
searching for my friend but don’t see him anywhere
probably went out to get fresh air
so I pulled up a chair
and kicked back like the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air
feeling kinda’ fly in the clothes that I wear
had some fresh Nike–Air and my Pierre Cardin
I get recognised by a bre’
trying to talk to me on some reh teh teh’
he was kinda’ boring me like Tony Blair, Blair, Blair
so I listened to him then I told him “yeah, yeah, yeah”
am I bothered? Do I care?
looked at the time and the time was weird
it said 14:20 oh my watch aint repaired
then I felt like a beer
double check my pocket but there aint’ no money there
it only made me more aware
I need to work harder just to have a better year
cos life aint’ easy when you’re broke man I swear
Track Name: Interlude #11

Jingle: WASH FM

Dave VJ: So we’re back after the commercial break. Let me tell you this now, DL and me have been talking in between records and one of the things that sets him apart from a lot of people as he’s explained to me is “hard work is a must”. How many hours a day would you say you actually work D?

Funky DL: I guess on average I work like a twelve hour day, umm sometimes more but rarely less . Because I do business with Japan and they have like an eight hour time difference, if I wanna catch them and correspond for the day, I have to get up at like six in the morning.
Track Name: The Morning
Intro Chorus
I don’t know bout’ you but
I gotta’ pick my shoes up
I gotta’ pick my tools up
I gotta’ make moves in the morning
in the morning (x7)

Verse One
I came so close to quitting
but when I look back to the words I’ve written
the same words I’ve been spitting for so long
I knew that giving up would be so wrong
I’m strong, that’s what I gotta’ be spiritually
in my soul, in my mind mentally and physically
guarantee my positive moves are made visibly
I was never brought on this earth to live miserably
so I made my own decisions
and had my own vision executed with precision
to make music and get y’all to listen
I committed to it stuck to the mission
then I arrived at a place
where I watched no face and I left no trace
of underperforming, slacking or stalling
it doesn’t end here, I’ll see you in the morning, the morning

I don’t know bout’ you but
I gotta’ pick my shoes up
I gotta’ pick my tools up
I gotta’ make moves in the morning (clap)
(x7) in the morning (clap)

Verse Two
To the Most High I gotta’ show gratitude
for those who did me wrong I aint’ mad at you
it’s just I had to change up my attitude
and get much closer to the things that really matter dude
now I have a much better latitude
better situations and all the things that, that includes
taking advantage of the assets that I haven’t used
to bring you all the kind of sound that really dazzles you
and put it on cycle mode
and incorporate all the things I’m told
and always step with a step that’s bold
and that’s my way till the day I’m old
cos my words aint’ made for ignoring
and life wasn’t made to be boring
and man was not created to be warring
just to work hard so I’ll see you in the morning, the morning


Verse Three
Yo, life’s hard lets face it
but it wasn’t meant to be basic or meant to be wasted
so if you need to give yours a facelift
do it but understand you gotta’ have patience
and if you think by doing the bare minimum
everything you’ve worked for will pay off in dividends (no way)
you’re wrong and need clarification
yo you gotta’ go beyond your expectations
and when you did that go beyond that
cos you get out what you put in that’s a fact
so if you desire sotin’ go for it
work hard then work some mo’ for it
try your best to save a little doe for it
teach yourself the things you need to know for it
(yeah) and this really aint’ a warning
all I’m trying to say is be ready for the morning, the morning

Track Name: Interlude #12

Dave VJ: Ah, DL, can you believe it? The time has gone so quick, we’ve just about reached the end of the show and it’s been an absolute pleasure having you on the air and in the studio. Would you like to say a shout out to anybody whilst I get the next record ready?

Funky DL: Certainly man, I mean I just wanna shout out all my fans that have been supporting me for over the years ya na’ mean? And I wanna dedicate this new album and this interview to a special little girl who’s gone through some hard times so… I love you to bits and I miss you so much… to Sharelle my God Daughter, I call her Gods Daughter…
Track Name: Gods Daughter
Yo, this for Relly Rells, this for Relly Rells, miss you

You’re Gods daughter, also my Goddaughter
your life is in a new place now you’ve turned the corner
I hope your future is clear and pure as water
I hope you get to do everything in your life that you wanna
I hope that you can look back on the way that you were brought up
I know that you were loved it’s just a shame that you got caught up
so take these lyrics that your Godfather thought up
it’s all that I can give until the day that I can call up

Verse One
Check it, I’m thinking right back to when you was just so small
when you could hardly talk and just about could stand to walk
I used to hear you in the background of my phone calls to your mum
I tried to visit though you wasn’t local
do you remember this? You might not
your fascination with the luminous green that’s on my Nike watch
it lights up but I wouldn’t let you wear it
I was honoured when your mum asked me to be your Godparent
I said yes although there was no ceremony
but you don’t need no ceremony if you truly know me
you got a little older then you started school
and you would play my songs over guess you thought they were cool
and there were times I used to take you to class
when I would pick you up you’d drag me to the ice cream van
you used to like to pay yourself so you will give him a pound
then walk away without your change and have to walk back down
you used to love Mickey D’s, Happy Meals with nuggets
still Fanta, no ice please! Sweet and sour sauce
and would pick the same seats every time
yeah you Gods daughter so it’s gone’ be fine, you Gods Daughter


Verse Two
I used to take you to the park where you was never idle
I read you stories and even read your Children’s Bible
you used to ask me bout God and Heaven
it’s a shame now the last time I saw you was about age seven
I got your 8th and 9th birthday card and I been trying hard to see you
now I’m told it’s not so simple
but I promised myself I’d never give up
til’ I exhausted all my options and I didn’t
I see your picture everyday in my crib
and I hope you’re doing well and love the life that you live
and I’m told that your grades are good academically
a lot’s happened but so many good memories remain
so know that you are dearly missed
and God is gonna carry you through times like this
and take you to wherever you deserve to be
and tell you that he loves you in these words through me
this is for Relly Rells and nobody else
yes it’s for you and not for no company sales
I’m trying to see you and I’m gonna try harder
cos I love you, take care… soon ... your Godfather

Chorus (x2)
Track Name: Wash FM Jingle
Jingle: WASH FM
Track Name: Good Music featuring Dukus Alemay
Mike, has that camera got film in it?
Parris what you doing with that light off?
“you are megalomaniac”
“he’s back! I’ve been looking for this guy for years”
Duke, zip your top up all the way man, core
What’s going on? Marilyn, hands off heads

I’ve never been lost with you
It’s hard not to be in love with you
Time and time again you are without a doubt so good to me

Verse One
Yo I aint trying to step on your toes
I’m just one of them bro’s with ill flows
like a pro I compose so cold it’s all froze
your highs are probably one of my lows
so don’t get too close
cos you know I’m probably bound to expose (oh!)
and who knows? I suppose that I’m bout to explode
so keep your distance don’t matter if you friend or a foe
I’m making you know moral could be a all time low
but it’s cool though, I figured how to make that grow
now it’s long like the words in my B.I.O.
I stand tall like a giant player fe-fi-fo
the fans go crazy every time they see my show
that’s why I’m telling the promoters that I need my doe
don’t wanna pay me? I get militant like G.I. Joe
and even if y’all get away with it at least I know
I cease to slow from the east with the beats that blow
show me red lights but I’m somebody that needs to go
give information on the basis of who needs to know
and I love to reap that’s why I got these seeds to sow
so if any fans want a photograph I’m pleased to pose
they ask me what I mean in lyrics I repeat my flows
these beats I chose they ask me yo whose beats are those?
These beats are cold like snow even beats that’s old
a Funk DL beat’s like a piece of gold
I do it for the whole world from the streets I roll, (oh!) its good music

I’ve never been lost with you
It’s hard not to be in love with you
Time and time again you are without a doubt so good to me
No I’ve never been lost with you
It’s hard not to be in love with you
Time and time again you’ll be without a doubt so good to me

Verse Two
(Oh!) Yes, guess who’s blessed with finesse?
dress to impress with this style I posses
I’m worldwide kinda’ like American Express
and stand for progress and won’t take much less
I take no stress but I do take requests
it’s easy because of all the time I invest
strategic just like chess so I can rock to the beat
or an acapella recess (oh!)
“I’m so focused so it’s never hopeless
and you can take that straight from the one who wrote this
nonetheless at my prime, at my best
I’m one of the nicest with the beats compressed” (oh!)
so like Busta, Charlie and Dinco what’s next?
Cos school’s out I left like Kanye West
and I don’t just love hip-hop I’m so obsessed
my eyes stay on the prize, have y’all noticed?
So don’t protest at the one who quotes this
listen a couple times then go promote this
and take interest as if you was Nat-West
it’s a good look like a model bout’ to undress (huh) (oh!)
me and my mic we so marvellous
I’mma keep this growing just like Gardeners
with two bars left I just wanna say this
I’m ghost and I love you all so God bless (oh!)

Track Name: The London Convention [A Dozen Years Later Remix] featuring Funky DL, MCD, Skinnyman, Blak Twang, ESP, TY, Phoebe One, Kwestmann, Q-Tee, Fallacy and Rodney P
Excerpt of MCD from film
“You know what? This is like history what you made here by having,
having so much UK rap artists in the same place at one time ya na’
that’s’ why I’m hanging around for a little while, are you filming that part?
It’s that history what Funky DL has made here by making… (history in the making)
all the rap artists be in one room at one time you na’ I’m saying?
It’s something what we can tell our children and our grandchildren about
you know I’m saying? (for real)

Intro (by Phoebe One)
Yo this is the L.O.N.D.O.N all-stars
hah, welcome to the UK convention

Funky DL
Funky DL, Funky like ya’ Grandma’s breath
take the M out of MC you got C left
add a O’ yes we rock the ill type show
took a year to teach the ocean how to maintain flow
still I kick it, treat it like a waffle then I flip it
your mic's made of paper but you still can’t rip it
me and Stixx came to bring the pain no doubt
get loose like your wisdom tooth then we out

Danger, member’ MCD’s no stranger to rhyme flows
time will tell, fakes get exposed
petro’ like you heard a thunder clap
this aint’ no sleeping slumber rap
in fact it’s some typical rhyme form
I never been a pawn on chess boards
I deal with agenda’s yes I’m agitated by wack frauds
And then it ain’t a long ting no sing or song ting’
Don’t get me wrong seen you dealing with a lyrically strong king

We see MC’s all fade away as we’ve see seasons come to pass
and only now we come to see that we must all get off our arse
DL has took the pupil from that Mud-Fam, Bury class
with his production we all function to it you with a blast
to make it last, I represent on mics without a doubt
like hip-hop I’ll never stop it’s what I’m all about
big up the MOBO award winning DL you get the shout
for giving me the chance to say big up from mud then I’m out

Blak Twang
Existing in this Babylon ses-pit, majestic
young, black and restless, never try to test this
left this with fire in my eyes and solar plexus
all praises due to the Father highly respected
yes it’s unification
history in the making like Jamaican world cup qualification
a new generation MC that don’t pett
if you aint’ calm reset it, then you get it (Taipanic)

Lyrics moving in a frantic motion, rhyming potion
12 MCs on a track boasting
verbal exercise, now it’s stabilized, hypnotized
vocals, Hackney local, album next year hopeful
special agents in a hidden zone
but not alone, coming through with 12 Stone
Alpha and Omega, verbally sever
And amputate body parts watch ESP depart

This is the T. to the Y. S. to the U. N. to the A. N. come again
let me show you, S. to the H. O. to the R. T. double E
Blitz, where these people gonna’ go to
when we just rip it rough, styles that are ludicrous
there’s not much you can do to us even when you are rude
killing it like Itchy and Scratchy, you know where to catch me
marketing my next release while Shorts is scratching the patchy
fa-fa-fa- far from it, people watch me like Halley’s Comet
stimulate me if you’re lyrics are ill you need to vomit

Phoebe One
This be the vinyl analysis rock till it crumbles
only Pheobeologist quake until it rumbles
break the beat down, I’ll pin it all up in your spinal
sit past tests UK props be the final
major hit squads take you wild as we bopping
so many MC’s DL be inviting
world better recognize, more than may we mention
welcome to the UK convention

Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh Kwestmann
Mr motion picture hit you all up in the jam
unite MCs on tracks like the Benetton
where you from? London the scales must weigh a tonne
whether some MCs think they’re the best MC’s
only the best MC is a one that’s worth seeing
whether European or universal not commercial
got these tracks London Town surround we gonna’ hurt you

Sometimes a poetess will be blessed with a rhyme
that flows easily line after line
people say come again one more time
and so it drops over the top long as the beat don’t stop
on as a beat goes on see where I’m coming from
cos I got lyrics, yes Q-Tee’s lyrically wicked
it’s out of place to fornicate if you’ve been microphone frigid
and so I hit it when I spoke how it choke
now biographically it’s called the murder that she re-wrote, I unquote

Hardcore from the squadron, whose the fire breathing
bleach dragon Don? Man of the battalion rolling
incredible, untouchable, what’s that?
Dress back, bullet proof, unbrushable
wear my cap down low so my eyes don’t show
when the camera clicks it won’t steal my soul
my guiding light in a self humane place
I massage my ego face to face I lace

Rodney P
Yeah check anytime we come we dett
I know you never hear dem’ style ya’ yet so hear dis’
as we move, ya hear me dude we rude
and can’t lose cos’ dem’ style yeah represent all crews
and all ends, big up my MC friends
who know it’s all about the lyrics again and hear this
you can trust it’s rough stuff we buss
but don’t sleep kah’ the reaper aint sleeping on us for real

Outro (by Rodney P)
“Yeah, you know, this how we do it, anytime we pass through it
we got the flow to it you know, that’s rules. Big up all outta town MC’s but this one’s a London ting’ for real..